The Return of the Heel

Whilst watching a recently released concert on one of the YouTube channels I subscribe to, I was catapulted back to March 2020. It hit the channel this month, but the actual recording took place a few years ago and the artist had edited the event, to include a more a current narrative. The video was filled with various images of masked people, empty streets, and the world-famous elbow bump greeting. I can still remember sitting on the couch, looking across at Roland, both of us frowning, not quite comprehending what ‘lockdown’ meant and how this was going to affect our family. Before I could blink, it was work from home, school from home and church from home. I think we all had that one moment that’s forever tattooed in our memories. The first time we heard lock-down, pandemic, and compulsory masks. The first time we heard social distancing and isolate. The first time we heard Covid vaccine and the big debate on taking or not taking it. Just watching the video brought on a little anxiety and typing these words makes me have to breathe deeply.

Prior to lock-down, I belonged to a team that had already started the hybrid model of work-from-home. Two days in the week meant no traffic, no rushing around, working in solitude, in the comfort of my home. By the time the pandemic hit, working from home was something I had become accustomed to. Well into 2020, we made our last trek to our offices to clear out our personal possessions because our team would not be returning to the office at all. Now, if you know me, you are probably thinking, “Well, I can only guess how much stationery she had to pack up!” True….but there was one other cupboard that took up quite a bit of space as well and needed careful, tender packing up. My shoe cupboard.

Working in central Johannesburg meant that I could easily spend an hour and a half in traffic just getting to the office. Factor in collisions, taxi’s and (yes-even then) loadshedding, it could take up to another 90 minutes to get back home. After a month or so of constant moaning and griping, I decided that the Gautrain was the best option for me. I did see brave souls hobbling along with heels, trying to make a dash for the train and the Gaubus, pushing their way in, nearly breaking a heel in the process. I didn’t have the energy for so much drama that early in the morning before coffee. So, I would put on my sneakers for the trek on the train to the office, arrive there, open my shoe cupboard, and decide what kind of heel I wanted for the day. Kitten heels for boring meetings (yawn-risk and such) and block heels for days with any activity involving ISO 27001/27002 because those are never ending. Wedges for the dreaded monthly meetings, where the agenda never changed, and tasks were never completed. I went for the lunch.

Platform wedges for Fridays because I had to make a turn at Rjana’s for tinfish or patha samoosa’s. Wedges were also comfy enough so I could walk to Chicken Licken for wings at lunchtime. Pumps or Mary Jane’s if I was going anywhere with my short work bestie. No need to look like an Amazon warrior next to a petite pixie. And stilettos. For meetings where I knew people were coming for a fight!

These were rotated on a regular basis and at any given time I had about 6 different pairs in my cupboard, excluding the pair of running or walking sneakers that I had arrived in. My shoe cupboard was legendary and some of my colleagues had been roped in to sign for my shoe packages when they were delivered to the office while I was out having coffee, ahem, working. (Ssssshhhhhh-my boss reads my blog).

I shed a tear or two packing up my collection. During our initial lock-down online meetings, I do recall being asked (several times!) what I had done with all my shoes.

Since March 2020 my babies stayed safely tucked away in their little plastic boxes barely making an appearance in lock-down life.

After many heated debates with myself (yes, I talk to myself-King David did it so why can’t I?), I donated quite a few pairs of shoes, glad and somewhat relieved that they went to a new home. I do hope their new owners give them as much love and care as I did. That still left me with quite a collection, post lock-down. I had given up wearing heels completely for the last 2 years and 8 months. There are quite a few things, now that I really give it some thought, which stopped during lock-down and I haven’t gotten round to starting again. There are also things I started in lock-down that I stopped doing, now that my world has returned to some semblance of pre-lock down normalcy.

Here's a list of my comebacks, that I think some of you may identify with. I’m calling it ‘The Return of the Heel project. Why? Because wearing my heels gave me a sense of joy. It boosted my confidence. It made me happy when someone noticed my shoes and said, “Wow, that’s a really pretty shoe!” It gave me great pleasure to respond, “I got it on sale, you can find it at…….” Hey, if you're reading this and didn't know, I'm an Indian. And we're always looking for a bargain!

It started with me going back to wearing heels regularly and from that, I hope to revive some of my other habits and traits that have somehow dimmed after the trauma of the last 2 years.

---

> Shoes and Something Sparkly

I once read an article that said if you’re a female in a male dominated industry and you feel one of them needs to be brought down a peg or two, you should look at their shoes. It apparently makes them self-conscious and throws them off-kilter. I don’t know if this is true. To tell you the truth, my love for shoes outweighs anything else. I’m just an admirer of shoes, even men’s shoes. If you have given up something during lock-down, like I did my heels, maybe it’s time for a comeback. Make-up? Buy that Mac Russian Red again (think Angelina Jolie as Maleficent!). Toss the sneakers for stiletto’s, even if it’s just to the shops for a quick bread and milk dash. (Try to avoid pairing it with a trackpants. Just-don’t). There were days during lock-down that I worked in pj’s or track pants. I most certainly never put on any jewellery either. Since April 2022, when we were thrown back into ‘normal’ life, I didn’t change some of the good (and bad) habits I had started. Its time.

Clothing cupboards have been de-cluttered and donations made. Old make-up has been chucked out and replaced with new. Shoes have been re-set and I can now see what I own. Jewellery has been polished and is gleaming and sparkly once more. One of the things my friend pushed me to do late last year was to switch my camera on for the 1st five minutes of any meeting. Soon enough, the people on the call also started doing the same and we got to see some friendly faces instead of a static image. This forced me to dress up and slap on some make-up. I had to dig out those fabulous earrings and put on my much loved bracelets. So what if it’s only for 5 minutes? It there’s one thing that lock-down taught us it is that the next 5 minutes are never guaranteed.

---

> Random Acts of Kindness

Why has this suddenly come to a screeching halt in my life? I used to regularly cook meals for people who had been diagnosed with Covid, get into my car, drive to them and drop it off. I would cook for a family who was grieving and drop that off. We would buy groceries, fresh fruit and vegetable as well as treats for people we felt needed a spoiling, especially since our jobs were not affected by the complete shut-down of the country. I would budget for giving because many of our friends, family and church members lost their streams of income. I would actively send flowers to women, who were going through tough times in their relationships and a delivery from Netflorist always brightens up the day. My reasoning was that I had a husband to spoil me with flowers for no reason so I could spoil a special lady for no reason at all. I used to visit the site often, stock up on vouchers while they were on sale and always have credit available to send a little something to a fellow sister, who didn't have anyone in her life to spoil her.

Suddenly, even though I now have much more freedom to do this, I have become too busy to continue. It’s even easier to do now with Checkers60 and Woolies Dash. Has my life really become so busy or have I gone back to pre-lock down behavior of being self-absorbed and self-serving? Time to re-assess, re-coup and get back to random acts of kindness.

---

> Hobbies

When certain levels of lock-down were lifted, I remember us driving to a popular hiking spot. Now, this is not an activity I embrace willingly. It’s more of a compromise, just so that we can spend time together as a family. Much like any other day that involved hiking, I had unenthusiastically dragged on my gear, slapped on some sunscreen, and propelled myself to the car with a bottle of water. We arrived only to find the cars lined up for about 500m to gain entry.

We hit a sho’t left and ended up just mooching around another spot, browsing 2nd hands books, and eating pies instead. In January this year, we drove past the very same spot, and it was eerily, surprisingly empty. No que to get in. Now that everything was open again, being outdoors was no longer holding as much appeal as it did during lock-down. We ourselves were not on our way to hike!

Why am I suddenly content again to sit in front of the TV or just lay on the couch on a perfectly beautiful summers day? Put me in lock-down again and I will be the first in that que of cars! So, I bought myself some new hiking sneakers and it’s time, I think, to break them in and give it a test run.

Reading has always been at the top of my list of hobbies. It outranks everything else. I read less during lock-down. For some reason, people got stuck on streaming services and we all ended up watching copious amounts of series and movies. I still don’t have an explanation as to why I did that. It wasn’t as if I didn’t have books to read. I think I just did what everyone else did, justifying it by alleging it was alleviating the stress of lock-down. That horrible habit has stuck and this year, I am making a determined effort to read more books. It helps that a friend gifted me a notebook for Christmas that allows me to summarise the books I have read, note down pertinent points and keep track of authors and titles. It gives me immense satisfaction to see the list of books that I have read steadily growing.

Current titles include ‘Winning the War on Worry’ by Louie Giglio, ‘Enjoying God’ by Tim Chester (a signed copy whooo hoooo) and JD Robb’s ‘Naked in Death’ – I finally found the first book in this series and even though I have read many others in the series, I have to read the one that kicked it all off. I do still watch a few choice series and I have avoided starting any new recommendations, until I am done with my current watch-list.

---

> Health and Fitness

Prior to lock-down, I would walk 3km in 30 minutes several times a week. Not the greatest of times or stats but I was consistent. I would walk around my house during the peak of lock-down just to get some steps in, and my yard, then, was a matchbox. We have since moved and have more than ample space for me to comfortably map out a route for myself that allows me to see a different street every day. You can count on one hand the number of times I have actually done it.

During lock-down, I did the virtual JP Morgan challenge and even have a medal to prove it! My friend asked me recently if I’m doing the JP Morgan 5km challenge with her this year, and without even thinking about it I said no. Do I have a good reason? NO. I have all the freedom to do it, maskless and with no restrictions, so I have no idea why I wouldn’t consider it.

Perhaps I have started taking all this freedom for granted again? I made big promises to myself, that when lock-down ended, things would be different. Here I am, 2 months into this brand-new year, and I’m back to my lazy, sluggish lifestyle. We yearn to do things when we are restricted and avoid doing them like the plague when those same restrictions are removed.

---

> New Blues

Lock down brought in all types of blues. Not seeing family and friends. Not being able to enjoy a meal or a cup of coffee at your favourite spot. No parties, limited celebrations and certainly no church or games night! Lock-down brought in all types of new. We all became innovative, creative beings, finding new ways to do things. New recipes were flying around. I remember that I attempted naan bread. You might think this is an easy enough bread to make. Trust me. It’s not. I tried the 2-ingredient recipe (yoghurt and self-rising flour). I recreated childhood recipes for toffee apple and brownies became my speciality. I have mastered onion rings (because-Spur!) and chocolate-coffee cupcakes was a weekly treat.

Video calls were the norm of the day. The only person I still video call is my nieces baby Kriya, and that’s because she is my very own entertainment channel, churning out new tricks every day, the latest being her version of Michael Flatley’s ‘Feet of Flames’.

I haven’t seen my niece Natalie in almost a month, and I have not yet done a video call with her. During lock-down, family video calls were a weekly must. I’m not sure why this has become non-existant in my life but absolutely something I need to start up again.

During levels of lock-down that allowed gatherings, no-one missed a get together or a family hook-up. You would double-mask if you had to. There was every likelihood that we might be flung into a level 5 lock-down or never see that loved one again.

These days, do you find yourself making excuses to get out of gatherings? That we are suddenly not concerned when we haven’t seen family and friends for months? A simple coffee, which was a treat between March 2020 and April 2022 is now burdensome and a waste of time?

---

I don’t know what your February has looked like, but I feel like it’s November already. I feel that exhausted and listless, which is usually a month 11 type of dilemma. I’m scratching my head, scrunching up my face thinking how long it’s been since I spoke to so and so. I look at my menu and realize that I have repeated the same meals since January, not one single new dish has been attempted. I have not made any strides towards scheduling a video catch-up with my friends in other countries and even though my schedule includes some time allocated for fitness, I have yet to do 3kms in 30 minutes. So today, instead of sitting hunched in front of my laptop, I’m slipping on my (new, fabulous) running shoes and hitting the road for 3kms. I have no hopes that it will take me 30 minutes. But it’s a good day to stop and smell the roses or whatever flowers I might come across on the way. It’s a good day to video call someone whose face I haven’t seen in a while and it’s a good day to dust off the brownie pan and whip up a batch for the weekend. What’s on your ‘Return of the Heel’ project?